Real Talk Mothering

I have a love-hate relationship with motherhood, particularly being a full-time stay-at-home mom (SAHM). In case you were curious, here's my feelings divided into 3 lists. WHAT I HATE DOING Meeting competing needs of my 2 kids who are 2.5 years apart (i.e. she loudly wants me to play with her while he needs to quiet down for a nap) When they fight me while I’m trying to take care of them (changing diapers, washing their hands, wiping their noses, tending to scrapes/cuts, putting them to bed) When they are demanding/distracting/clingy while I’m trying to cook (i.e. clinging to my leg while I’m trying to drain the boiling pot of pasta) When they are fickle, especially not eating food I’ve just prepared that they asked for When they argue and are illogical, which is maddening When they cry and melt down because I won’t give them things they can’t play with (i.e. knives) WHAT I DON'T MIND DOING Changing diapers (except when they wiggle and kick and roll over) Giving baths (except w...

I used to be really annoyed by my children's bad behavior or moods but  I've noticed that I am the main factor in determining the interactions and mood in our home, and there are only 2 main directions to go. It's as simple as black or white and self-perpetuating.  The Vicious Cycle My thoughts - You’re annoying me, be quiet, leave me alone, I don’t want to be around you, I don’t like you, you’re being bad My mood - impatient, irritated, exacerbated Their behavior - whining, crying, disobeying, screaming, kicking, running away, talking back The Virtuous Cycle My thoughts - I love you, I like being around you, I want to help you, you’re lovable, I cherish you, you’re a good child, you're just learning and trying to express yourself My mood - curious, helpful, patient Their behavior - cooperative, playful, happy, affectionate, helpful --- Parenting is the ultimate self-improvement project. I have to be really self-aware and intentional in following the virtuous cycle...